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The Embodiment of Self-Love: The Difference between Self-love and Self-care

  • Writer: Shiann Singleton
    Shiann Singleton
  • Nov 21
  • 3 min read

Updated: 23 hours ago


When most people hear the term self-love, they often think of self-care. Self-care involves taking intentional action to preserve or improve your health, whether that means enjoying a bubble bath, applying a face mask, caring for your hair, or treating yourself to a spa day. These practices are meaningful and are certainly a part of self-love, but self-love reaches much deeper than routine care. It reflects the overall regard you have for your well-being and happiness. It shapes the way you see yourself and guides the choices you make every day. Without it, it becomes easy to slip into a mindset that convinces you to accept less than you deserve, to remain in environments that disrupt your peace, and to overlook your true value. Understanding self-love also includes acknowledging how the absence of it can quietly hold you back from becoming your best self. This post will explore what self-love truly means and how lacking it can influence the way you move through your life.


What Self-Love Actually Looks Like

Self-love is about intentionally choosing actions that support your growth, health, and long-term happiness. A person who loves themselves is more likely to:


  • Nourish their body with healthy foods and movement out of respect for their health and longevity

  • Surround themselves with people who uplift, support, and genuinely care about their growth

  • Build skills, pursue opportunities, and strive for stability and abundance because they believe they deserve a fulfilling life

  • Show up for themselves in their goals, dreams, and difficult moments

  • Make decisions with their best interests in mind, even when those decisions bring discomfort or sacrifice

  • Set boundaries without guilt, understanding that saying no is an act of self-respect


These habits and choices build a foundation for a life that reflects your true worth and potential. Self-love requires consistently showing up for yourself, protecting your peace, setting boundaries, and investing in your dreams and overall well-being. By practicing self-love, you create a life that mirrors the value you place on yourself.


What Struggling with Self-Love Looks Like

Struggling with self-love is unfortunately common and often goes unnoticed, quietly convincing you that you are undeserving of happiness, success, or love and subtly influencing your choices in harmful ways. A person struggling with this concept may:


  • Turn down or don’t pursue opportunities they have dreamed of because they do not believe they deserve them, or because unhealthy habits hold them back

  • Compromise their health, peace, or freedom through destructive choices or chaotic environments

  • Surround themselves with people who mistreat them because deep down they have been conditioned to believe that is all they deserve

  • Act against their own best interests even when they know it causes harm


The shift begins when you become aware of these patterns. Awareness enables you to break the cycle and cultivate a healthier, more loving relationship with yourself. As you start making choices that honor your values, you naturally begin to support your own growth, healing, and transformation.


The Heart of the Message

Self-love is more than an act; it is a mindset and an ongoing practice of choosing yourself, believing in your worth, and building a life that reflects that belief. When self-love feels difficult, the first step is often awareness. Begin by noticing the thoughts that limit you or diminish your sense of worth and gradually replace them with choices and actions that align with your values. With time, intention, and consistency, those small shifts begin to reshape your emotional world and ultimately transform your life for the better. Take a moment today to choose yourself in a simple, meaningful way. Set a boundary that protects your peace, take one step toward a goal you have been putting off, or gently remind yourself that you deserve love and respect. Each step you take, no matter how small it may seem, is a powerful act of self-love and a declaration of who you are becoming.


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