When My Image Came into This World

When my image came into this world,

you were right by my side.

I knew that I loved you,

but I didn’t know why.

God said, “May you be husband and wife,”

and like that, we were wed.

But after 500 years of marriage,

I kind of feel misled.

When we first got married,

I felt like we belonged,

and the best part was we got along.

And overall, like a piece to a puzzle,

we just fit.

But after having your baby,

you turned out to be inadequate.

You don’t help with our child.

We don’t bond without sex.

All you talk about is the birds in the sky,

the mammals on the ground,

and the animals in the trees.

It was cute for the first couple centuries.

But now I wonder, is that all you see?

What about me?

And what about baby Cain?

You’re gone all day.

These are all the things I want to say.

But I sweep it all under the rug

and continue to be a good little wife,

or so I thought until this night.

One day in the garden,

Satan whispers to me,

“Why don’t you be a better wife?

Adam is tired of all the strife.

Embarrassed, I turned red.

“What do you mean?”

Satan smiles that mischievous smile

and looks at me.

“You don’t think he sees through that cute little act?

A perfect wife, you’re not.

You pretend to be that.

You secretly look at your husband

as if you were ashamed,

and that act in the bedroom is laughable.

Step up your game.”

“Did Adam say that to you?”

He smiled and nodded at me.

My temperature began to boil,

and I shouted,

“Why doesn’t he be a better

husband to me?

I do everything!

I cook,

I clean.

I take care of our child.

He does nothing!

“He’s constantly playing with animals in the wild.”

Then Satan said to me,

“Why don’t you tell him that, my child?

Better yet, tell him now!”

All of a sudden, I spotted Adam,

and all I saw was red.

Next thing you know,

I’m telling Adam all my deepest issues with him,

the ones I kept inside my head.

Next thing I know, God showed up and Adam said,

“I no longer wish to have her by my side.

She’s got a mind of her own.

She raised her voice at me.

She’s not submissive.

She’s not my wife.”

Shocked and hurt, I shed a tear.

But I quickly got angry

and I was ready to put up a fight.

Then God looked at me with sadness in his eyes.

Then I saw a white light.

God had banished me to a place unknown!

There are undesirables here,

demons and lost souls.

But strangely enough,

whenever I thought it,

I could still see into the garden.

God had put Adam to sleep,

and out of his rib was she.

I somehow knew her name was Eve.

Adam was then awakened, and God said,

“She is made from man,

so she shall be called woman,

and now you shall be wed.”

Adam smiled that same smile on our wedding night with all his teeth.

My heart shattered into a million pieces,

and then I screamed,

“Adam, I know our relationship wasn’t perfect,

but how could you prefer that bitch over me?”

But I was in another dimension, of course,

so he couldn’t hear me.